Unclaimed

These three things:

Assigned at random
to a double room
at the Nairobi YWCA
with a woman
my own young age
the only survivor
of her family
from Rwanda
I awoke
past midnight
so sick
and waited hours
to vomit
finally sticking
my finger down my throat
to find relief
her, awake
and listening
but silent
in the morning
took her picture with me
and called me sister
my address
I never heard
from her again

another time
six? or seven?
swimming out
to the float
I don't know why
but I went under
the neighbor saw
from shore
and rowed out
and dove in
and pulled me up
by my hair
I never
closed my eyes
underwater
I remember
calm
and green
and silt
in shafts of light and
two perch
watching me

and then
on a lark
the Outer Banks
friends of friends
with a friend
hurricane waves
so huge
and fun to dive through
timing everything
the friend
got rolled
and disoriented
swam for bottom
frantically
and stopped moving
and I could not
believe it
or remember
what to do
I punched
his belly
three times
and he retched
seawater
and sand
over both of us
we held each other so tightly
like lovers
trembling
and cold
in the sun
and not one other person
ever took notice
or knew
and we never
spoke of it again

slipped down
back behind the drawers

you won't find them
until the next move.